Fostering Children who Need Help   Mohammad Nujahid, 35, explains why he provides foster care for children who need extra attention when families are finding it difficult to cope.   FOSTERING is usually a temporary way of offering children of any age a home until they can return to their own families. Believe it or not, but up to 50 per cent of children entering care go into short term fostering, which ranges from an overnight stay to three months. Another type of fostering care is respite care, which involves looking after a child for anything from a few hours each week to a weekend per month, to give their family a break. The idea is to provide support to the family unit and help them stay together. Train driver, Mohammad Nujahid, has been providing respite care for the last three years. “I went into fostering because I couldn’t have children. I’ve done voluntary work since the age of 16 - first with elderly people but then I studied sign language and then started working with a wider range of ages. I found I enjoyed working with kids. “My local borough was advertising heavily for carers, and helping children just seemed the most natural thing to do for me.” After applying to be considered, the first step for any potential carer is to be assessed. This can take anything from 6 – 18 months. “Because of my work commitments and being single it took the longer time period. It also meant I could only offer respite care rather than anything more long term. I did not want to foster only to hand over the child to someone else while I went to work. “The assessments were not a stressful process – the social workers guide you through it, giving you advice and helping you fill out forms. Above all, you have to remember the process is worthwhile – it safeguards the child’s safety and yours as a carer.” Fostering can of course have a wider impact on friends on family. “I was lucky,” Mohammad insists. “The only initial detractor was my father who worried about possible problems because he was worried about me. But if you ask him now he’ll tell you how happy he is with me doing this.” In most cases the Borough concerned will try to match child in question with families that share the same racial or religious background. “That wasn’t an issue in my case. I’m Muslim but I was only going to be caring for a child for a few hours a week at most. It was the same consideration as far as I was concerned regarding the child’s age or any other factors. It didn’t make a difference to me. “I wasn’t nervous when he came to my house for the first time. The Agency is very good in making sure you meet the child first and get to know him as he gets to know you. It means you are both comfortable with each other. “Being a Muslim is important to me and it is an aspect of my life that I am glad I could share with him while I looked after him. He even speaks a few words of Urdu now!” After providing respite care for 3 years to the same child (now 15-years-old and just recently placed with a long term foster family), Mohammed is proud to note that while the child no longer needs his care, he has voluntarily opted to visit him and his family for Eid day. “He’s told us he wants to keep in touch with me and my family. It makes sense because my family has bonded with him – he calls my sisters aunty and has feelings for all of my family as they do for him. He’s also taken part in family gatherings and celebrations.” The next child he can help will be placed with him from April 2002. Again, it is a long but necessary process of getting each party comfortable. Mohammad did not want to commit to another child before because he felt the child he was looking after would suffer detrimentally from that new arrangement. “He needed the attention. I’m glad I’ve had the opportunity to provide respite care. It’s deeply satisfying knowing you’re filling a gap in a child’s life but also ensuring he stays with his family. It is a wonderful knowing that the smile on a child’s face is down to you. “I try to spend as much time outside the house on activities to interest him – walking, picnics, things really that will get him out of the house and that he’ll enjoy. “I can’t begin to describe how rewarding an experience this has been for me. I just don’t have the words. I would defiantly encourage Asians who have never thought about this to at least think about providing care in some form or another. It’s been the most rewarding experience of my life so far. The only qualities you need to have are a caring nature, good listening skills and to be emotionally supportive. The benefits you reap in return are unbelievable. “I know most Asians do not like to admit it and would prefer it was hidden, but there are Asian children out there who need to be given help. We need to face that fact – it is something that would benefit the carer and the child. “I want to adopt or perhaps offer long term foster care one day. I hope a time comes when my lifestyle means I can do that.”